Breathe

I hope this story can provide a glimmer of hope to people around the world who have lost hope, lost loved ones, lost jobs, and most of all, have lost belief in themselves since COVID-19 struck.

I dedicate this story to my friend, A, who reminds me of this quote from Rumi—"You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean, in a drop." 

Keep breathing, practice gratitude, and be mindful

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A cool breeze ran through the grass, making the blades of green ripple. The faint chirping of birds and soft humming in the background filled the silent air. The golden rays of sunshine crept over the distant hills, giving the dewdrops on the grass a beautiful shimmer. The quiet trickling of the river posed a new confidence in the air, filling the surroundings with the promise of a new beginning, telling the world that today would be a turning point. One that would start a new chapter, a new beginning, another chance to change. It was time to wash away the fears.

Change was coming. As the golden sun painted the black sky into a bright blue summer day, the flecks of sunlight splashed a new facade onto the dog, one that told the world that nothing would stop him.

Jimmy was his name, and it had been way too long—or so it seemed. As the old dog stared at the lake, he thought about those who were sad and hurting. He wanted to help, but how? His mind shifted and focused on the soft melody of the birds.

But, the tune was not soft to him. It filled him up with pain and rage. There was something else in the background. He had to get to it, to follow that melody. It sang of love and courage and most of all, hope. He loved how he felt: safe and warm; maybe even happy. He squeezed his eyes shut to push away the flashbacks of horror that appeared whenever he felt happy.

Jimmy grew spirited, and a slow smile crept across his face. Once he opened his eyes, the cloudiness in them disappeared. All that showed was a pristine sharpness: eyes that conveyed years of experience and wisdom. "Yes. I must show others how we can heal."

Jimmy ran back to his cold home, not with fear this time, but with pure determination. He wanted to help others see and feel the beauty of life. “Focus on the good,” he thought. “Be strong.” This new confidence washed through his veins, unleashing the power to help others. It boiled and whirled, rising up faster and faster. He knew what he had to do.

He took one last look at the whip that had beat him every day, left scars on his body, and made him cry in pain. He thought about his emaciated body. There would be no more whimpering, no more crying himself to sleep. He fed his anger with memories of the horrors he had experienced and let it rise from the pit of his stomach. And when it reached the tip of his tongue, he let out the loudest howl possible. He released the anger and turned it into the strength he knew he always had.

His spirit rose high. With no chains choking him, nothing could stop him. If only he could unleash all the others restricted by their own shackles. If only they could all be free and roam the earth without any fear or prejudice. If only.

And then he saw the smallest flicker of a light, the stars! The beautiful, twinkling miracles of hope—just what the world needed! He drew closer and closer to the stars. Oh, those mysterious balls of light emanating their true beauty and power! If only everyone could see it! They weren’t mere flecks in the sky, but so much more. Just like hope, the stars were always there. They just had to focus on them. The true world was beautiful, and the only thing that ever got dirty was the lens they saw it through.

He let hope fill him up, letting every cell, every vein soak in the feeling. But the sting came back. The feeling sliced the tiny shards of love and hope he had been clinging to. The cold reality came back, as the all-too-familiar bitter bile coated his tongue. He bit it back and swallowed. The cold rushed through his bones, making him shiver. And then came the pain. Jimmy found himself in a downward spiral—when would the darkness end?

“Light always wins over darkness,” a tiny voice inside him spoke. He repeated it over until he believed it. It soon became his new mantra, his new motive, his new fight song. Light flooded his mind with colors of all shades, patterns of all kinds, shapes of all sizes. Black wasn’t a color - just a combination of all the others. He wasn’t in it alone. The world would get through it together, fighting silently and fervently. He focused on the love, compassion, and kindness swelling within him. The feeling started as a flicker but swelled with warmth inside his flesh.

Jimmy recognized his strengths and this time when the pain came, he embraced it and let it course through his veins. He knew that his confidence would drown the pain, and it did. He was determined to free himself of the shackles and see the beautiful world.

He ran away, barking loudly this time - filled with happiness. He let the strong winds ripple his hair, and his eyes shone with palpable happiness. He was finally free. He could breathe!

Jimmy ran towards the moon, bedazzled by the stars that looked like scattered moondust all over the sky! In that magical moment, he sent a silent prayer to the universe, with gratitude for the beauty he saw that day. And as he bathed in the moonlight, he let his scars gleam with pride—proof that he was a survivor, a fighter.

This time, when he closed his eyes, he made a promise to the world: Life will get better. Sometimes, things have to get worse before they get better.

Have faith.

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(There's a Jimmy in all of us; we just need to find him!)

 

Where I’m From 

I am from the ordered, calm streets of Cupertino

With the rich greenery and blooming flowers,

Where even cars seem to say please and thank you, 

Unlike the bustling traffic and honking cars in India,

My second country,

The place my grandparents and cousins call home.

I am from festive spirits and mouth-watering sweets 

Where clouds of color dance in the air

To welcome the blossoming spring,

And the burgeoning fall has people twirling among the lamps and fireworks,

For in my culture, light conquers darkness,

 And good always wins.

I am from a circle of strength and love, 

Consisting of my perfect, patient parents and brilliant brother 

Who are my pillars of support,

A circle that gets stronger

 With every crisis and victory we face together, 

For we are always a united front! 

I am from a four-letter word

That extends far beyond what lays on the surface,

For within lies numbers and formulas floating around,

And proofs and explanations waiting to be found

By only the ones who recognize the patterns and make the connections

While questioning the normal to discover yet another approach! 

I am from “Why not?”, “How come?”, and “Why can’t I?”,

Always trying to find new ways to push myself,  

As well as “Tomorrow’s a new day”,

Letting myself and others know that one’s mistakes don’t define them,

And “Just because it hasn’t been done before doesn’t mean it can’t be done”,

Showing that boundaries set by prejudices can be pushed to explore what lays beyond.  

I am from rich music breaking the silence, 

Hearty laughs filling the air, 

And bright smiles lighting up the room,

All making it easy to look around,

Feel grateful and see the cup as half full,

And recognize that life is better when taking in the warmth!